Gratitude

 DISCLAIMER: Long, wordy and BITCHY post

When was the last time I wrote a ranting post? I think quite long ago because there hasn't been like HUGE events that happened in my life that's really worth ranting about. So today, I shall rant because I'm worth it...

Anyway, I'm not at home right now so there won't be any photos in this entry; my camera's not with me. But be sure to stay tuned for next week's update as I'll bring you ayumi hamasaki's ayu-mi-x 7 LIMITED COMPLETE BOX box packaging and my opinions on the new remix albums.


Back to the topic. Today, I did something good (and bad, but it depends on how you see it) - I went to the Institute of Mental Health (IMH) to be a volunteer along with Jessica and her friends, Vera and Alvin. What?! I very kind one okay so don't be judging me!! I would say it was enjoyable (the first part) but things got really sour and fierce.

Anyway, if you are not interested in reading the goody-2-shoes-Broy, scroll down to "CASE OF THE MISSING SUSHI" for the bitch me. More juicy stuff!!



Let's talk about the good stuff first. So we woke up really early in the morning, at around 8:30am. One of those rare moments where Vera actually wakes up earlier than us. I had 2 cups of Milo because there was extras and we walked over to the hospital. Yes. It's that near my house.

Met up with Jessica and Jia Jia!! Long time since I've seen Jia Jia! She told me that she wants to become a fashion photographer too! Ain't that cool? I think the last time I saw this apparel design graduand was when I was still working at URS. Now ain't that a long time??

Reached IMH and was split up into smaller groups. Was really surprised that the turned out was so good - there were lots of volunteers! We went to the group where we were tasked to guide the old folks to do some art and craft. Actually, it was just coloring but oh well...

I tell you!! Old folks are hard to guide, especially when they are coloring. They tend to be so engrossed with their art pieces that they ignore you so you have to work really hard to engage with them. What we did was to offer the folks the color pencils to encourage them to change their pencils. Otherwise, they will color the whole piece of paper in a single color - not aesthetically pleasing, yes?

BUT BUT! They were really fun to work with when you finally break through their personal barriers. Their smiles are so adorable! I mean, isn't that what you seek for when you volunteer? To make a difference in someone's life even if it's just for a smile?

Besides coloring, there was a group of people who went dancing and singing with the folks. They were so active I was a little afraid that I might be dragged to dance with them (You won't want that to happen! Everyone will turn blind if I did~!). Vera and the rest got dragged to the dance floor though. A pity my camera was kept away in my bag because I didn't know about the regulations of photography in the place so better be safe than sorry.

When it was tea time, we fed the folks. Erm... They had like cakes with kuey and meat all thrown in the same plate - not very appetizing if you asked me but they enjoyed it so...

Yeap. Basically, that's all I want to talk about the volunteering session because typing on this keyboard isn't as comfortable as my own. :P Overall, it was enjoyable but sadly, I don't think I want to go back there again - at least not under this organization. Here comes the free bitch, baby!

 CASE OF THE MISSING SUSHI
and the old hag that doesn't get it

 What happened:

Jessica lost her sushi. Well, big deal right but NO! She made those sushi all by herself and woke up damn early in the morning so that she can cook the rice, prepare the ingredients and roll the maki so that others can enjoy her masterpiece. I tried one and it was really great but they were GONE! Jessica's intention was to share her sushi with the old folks as well as her friends - especially her friends because she wants them to have a first taste of her cooking. Isn't she sweet?

BUT! Disaster struck and her sushi was taken away! So here's what exactly happened - as accurately as I can put it in words. After being split into groups at the lobby, we were brought up to a ward upstairs to interact with the folks. We were instructed to leave our bag in one of the check up rooms and we complied. Not wanting her sushi to be taken away, Jessica used my bag as well as hers to cover up the container of goodness but before that, she placed the container inside a red plastic bag and tied it up. After that, we went off to do our stuff.

When we were done, we went back to the room to grab our stuff but alas! Jessica's sushi disappeared into thin air and no one had a clue where the hell they went! Mysterious isn't it? And Jessica was really upset because she spent so much effort to make those sushi.

The investigation:

We tried to search around, duh! But of course, we couldn't find it (otherwise, I wouldn't even bother writing this post right?) We searched the ward but couldn't find it. We asked around and no other volunteers had any clue where the sushi disappeared to. Peculiar peculiar. So, we went downstairs because we were told that food will be provided for the volunteers.

Went downstairs and apparently, the food was provided by the other volunteers. Such nice people. But we were more concerned about the sushi. We went to search the buffet table to see if someone mistakenly took the sushi thinking that it was part of the spread but to no avail. Jessica was so upset she had to go to the washroom to let go of her emotions. Honestly, I had no idea how to react because it was so sudden and it really hurts me to see my friend so upset and slightly mad that her hard work was taken from her without permission.

When she was more collected, we went to ask another volunteer - dressed in white and her hair looks as though a typhoon just passed Buangkok regarding the sushi. Well, I appreciate her help in asking the people there if they had seen the sushi. YES! They did!

The uncle said he remember seeing the old folks at Level 5 eating those sushi Jessica made. He had no idea where the sushi came from so we didn't manage to find out who took the sushi from Level 6 to Level 5. We weren't exactly pleased because they did not ask Jessica's permission for the sushi. Furthermore, the lady in white and the uncle simply laughed the matter away as though it wasn't serious. 

But it was damn serious to me.

They thought that we were so concerned about the sushi because those sushi were not meant for them. In fact, they were meant for the folks but that's not the main point. They laughed the matter off saying that it's a good thing the old folks had the sushi. That, I know but not asking before taking someone else's belongings? That's a big NO NO!! They initially thought that the sushi was meant for Jessica's mom that's why we were so concerned but that's not the point as well.

The argument:

Here comes this aunty then - apparently the organizer. How should I describe her? Badly dyed hair, short, grumpy and didn't leave me a good impression on first look because she was yelling at the volunteers and yes, she's ageist (YES! There's actually such a word called ageist!) meaning she thinks she's greater than anyone who has lesser white hair than she does (that's why the bad dye job).

She knows that we were jolly well upset so she came over to see what the din was about. So we told her that the sushi went missing and like a typical adult she is, she kinda brushed it off as something trivial. At that moment, Jessica went emotionally unstable again and then the aunty wasn't exactly being helpful by saying that she didn't mind not having the sushi (COME ON! It's not for you in the first place, bitch!) and that Jessica did a greater deed by "offering" the sushi to the old people.

Correction. Her sushi were TAKEN away from her WITHOUT her bloody permission. Jessica wants her friends to have some of the sushi first before she personally hand out the sushi to the others but she was robbed of that chance. Who's fault? No one knows...

Then the aunty defended and defended and I grew pisser and pisser. Until I finally said...

"What if it was something more precious/more expensive?"

something along that line...

And that's when I opened up that can of worms. The aunty thought I was accusing her volunteers of stealing. Actually, YES! I could have told her that the act of taking someone else's things prior asking for permission is lawfully theft but I didn't go there because I wasn't that mean, yet.

And there so goes saying that she "forgives" me for what I said because I'm young (well, that's one of those times where I feel that my little boy look gives me a really huge disadvantage - during quarrels) and that my words were hurtful. Hello! What about the person who lost her stuff?

Then I said something like what if the thing was something more important than sushi? She defended and said that the sushi were meant for the old folks (Hello? Where did you get that idea from? No one told you we made sushi in the first place) and that it was a greater deed to let the old folks have it. She didn't get it.

MAIN POINT: Taking people things without permission
HER POINT: The sushi should be given to the old folks because it's more meaningful

YES!! I know that the old folks should get the sushi but that's not my point. My point is that they should not just take anyone's stuff without having the courtesy of asking first! Then, she made up this defend saying that the sushi was left along with the food for the old folks.

RECALL: We hid the sushi with our bags and tied up the plastic bag. First of all, they should not know that there were sushi inside because if they were righteous, they should not touch other people's things, let alone undo the plastic bag in the first place. Secondly, the stuff were not placed with the food. Thirdly, she cooked up this defend that she was kind enough to open the container so that the sushi won't go bad.

QUESTION: HOW THE BLOODY HELL DID YOU KNOW WHERE WE KEPT THE SUSHI and WHO THE HELL WOULD OPEN SOMEONE ELSE'S LUNCH BOXES WITH THE NOTION THAT THE FOOD MIGHT GET BAD?! Do you go around the food courts to open packet of food to prevent them from going bad? Come on aunty! What are you? Senile?!

EVIDENCE: The "crime" was done intentionally but the intention might not be that evil but this aunty sure is. I KNOW that it's a good deed to give the food to the old folks but what's my main point, my dear readers? Plus, she's not sure what she's talking about. Stupidity has a limit okay?

So when she accused us for placing our things around without care, the girls went like "WE DID!!" Stupid aunty.

And she went on the rant and rant and rant about what I said.

But again, let's put it this way. If the sushi was INDEED for Jessica's mother, how is she going to explain to her mom? How is she going to go prepare another set of sushi again? What if the sushi is something of huge significant to Jessica? Then isn't this "theft' more serious? Luckily, it was meant for the old folks so it's not that bad BUT for the sake of argument, it's for something else. Then this aunty should be ashamed of herself.

For the sake of argument again, what if the sushi was something more important, say my camera? They can just "borrow" my camera to take photos without my permission if they can take the sushi away. That's partially the point I was driving at - what if it was something IMPORTANT.

And (GOSH I regret not bringing this point up) - What if the sushi were contaminated or they were for lab rats? What if the old folks ate something contaminated and it wasn't for them. I'm not trying to say that the sushi were bad but what if someone brought something inedible and was mistakenly given to the innocent old folks? Now that would be shit hits the fan...

Did I mention that she threw me this question and asked me to imagine myself in the shoes of these folks? That I only get to get some good food every fortnight and how grateful I would be. Again, she went out of point because it's not the bloody kind deed - it's the act of "theft"!

Throughout the whole argument, she was unapologetic and extremely stubborn to see things in our light because we indeed saw hers. I mean, the least you could do was to APOLOGIZE for taking someone else's things without asking and for not being able to give it back to her. NO! She insisted that we were wrong and she is right because we were YOUNGSTERS. Fine. Screw you freakin' bitch!

We, especially me, got so sick and tired of arguing with her I walked away - blood boiling like never before. I can't imagine how Jessica can still tell them that she will make more sushi next time for the rest of them. I believe she's just being nice because Jessica was also sick and tired of listening to that old cow. Jessica Jessica... Sometimes she's too kind hearted...


The resolution:

 We left IMH madder (pun intended) than we were. Heck. I stormed down the walkway with @#$%^&^%$# by my mouth. No, not vulgarities but the angst and the negative energy. It's been so long I've argued with someone so seriously. I'm never going back under that organization to volunteer because instead of being appreciative, they were defensive and air-headed.

I think I showed my "true colors" to Jessica's friends who had only seen me for the first time today and I apologize for being so mean but I couldn't help watch my friend get bullied. That's me - the Aries came out today and I didn't regret a single bit. I hope the aunty wakes up her bloody idea because if she goes this way, no one would want to volunteer ever again.

Bitch.




I feel so much better after airing all this anger out. Writing is one of the best forms of anger relief for me. I don't care how people view me because so long as I stand for what I believe is right, I will fight for it. Even if you are my best friend and you feel that I did it wrong, I don't care. Life is all about fighting for what you believe in, no?

Sometimes, I feel like I should be a lawyer because I like to do these kind of mindless arguments but again, I don't want to study so oh well...

Time to stop this entry. It's getting long... But before I end...

What would you do if you were in my shoes?
Post your comments here.

word count (in case you want to know): 2,688